Tag Archives: anniversary

Prone to forget our wedding vows

“Do you remember your wedding vows?”

Someone asked us this recently.

I started with a few words – “Cheryl, I vow… to…”

…but then had to stop.

I had to admit I couldn’t remember them well. Even though they’re stuck on our fridge door, which we walk past every day!

Thankfully, we’re reminded of our vows (in splendid colour!) from 1:40 – 2:10, and 2:58 – 3:40 of our wedding video.

 

On hearing us make those vows again today, three years on, these were the bits that stuck out to me afresh:

“I vow…to commit my entire life to knowing and loving God, and to knowing and loving you.”

… only Jesus Himself can provide that sort of servant-hearted love!

“…so that our marriage will be better on its last day than its first.”

… only Christ can supply the day-to-day dying to self and living for the other that could possibly enable this!

It’s helpful to remind ourselves that, in the words of Tim Keller:

“Wedding vows are not a declaration of present love but a mutually binding promise of future love.”

So for what it’s worth, Cheryl, everything we’ve been through so far has been worth it to get a front-row seat to the beautiful woman God is shaping you to be!

 

William and Cheryl collage - tekapo 2010

 

Happy 3rd anniversary my love!

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Song recommendation: Andrew Peterson, “Dancing in the Minefields”

It’s our 1st wedding anniversary today! So here’s a song that we both enjoyed this year. We’re not as young as the guys Andrew Peterson sings about when we got married – but these words speak of the same struggles, the same joys, the same realisation of utter dependence on God’s grace to hold us together, and to refine our lives in the process!

Especially like the backing vocals during the chorus, gently urging: “Don’t give up!” Here are the words:

Well I was 19 you were 21
The year we got engaged
Everyone said we were much to young
But we did it anyway
We got the rings for 40 each from a pawnshop down the road
We said our vows and took the leap now 15 years ago

We went dancing in the minefields
We went sailing in the storm
And it was harder than we dreamed
But I believe that’s what the promise is for

Well ‘I do’ are the two most famous last words
The beginning of the end
But to lose your life for another I’ve heard is a good place to begin
Cause the only way to find your life is to lay your own life down
And I believe it’s an easy price for the life that we have found

And we’re dancing in the minefields
We’re sailing in the storm
This is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that’s what the promise is for
That’s what the promise is for

So when I lose my way, find me
When I lose loves chains, bind me
At the end of all my faith
to the end of all my days
when I forget my name, remind me

Cause we bear the light of the son of man
So there’s nothing left to fear
So I’ll walk with you in the shadow lands
Till the shadows disappear
Cause he promised not to leave us
And his promises are true
So in the face of all this chaos baby
I can dance with you

So lets go dancing in the minefields
Lets go sailing in the storms
Oh lets go dancing in the minefields
And kicking down the doors
Oh lets go dancing in the minefields
And sailing in the storms
Oh this is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that’s what the promise is for
That’s what the promise is for

We’re off somewhere exciting for lunch and dinner, probably. Looking forward to having a great time rejoicing in what the Lord’s worked in our lives so far.

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– Cheryl and William

There’s still a lot to learn!

On Friday, we had an enchanting night out to celebrate six months of married life. Dinner at a fine Italian-style restaurant on Cockle Bay, a random interlude of Christ-centred rap music, then an evening of enjoying each other’s company, and reflecting on the amazing partnership, the astounding gift God has given us.

Even in just six months, God has already taught us heaps. There are some things about marriage (and about your partner for life) you can only learn by actually being in the thick of a confrontation, or in the aftermath of a disappointing exchange. Books on marriage can only trace outlines around the specific issues in our marriage… real-life issues such as living with your spouse’s habits, and how to show patience, forbearance and forgiveness towards their SSB’s (secret single behaviours). Over time, we’ve realised more and more how immensely dependent we are on the Lord to change us and help us to serve one another better.

What challenges and convicts us the most, however, comes from a passage in the Apostle Paul’s letter to the Ephesian church.

Eph 5:31-32: “‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”

Our marriage is a picture, however imperfect, of Christ’s covenantal love for His church. We earnestly want to improve our marriage, not because it makes us look good, not because we get fame and glory, but so that it would be a better picture of Christ’s marriage to the church. That’s something worth striving towards, we think.

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– Cheryl and William